First year of teaching is hard. Heck, teaching in general is hard. I know we aren't supposed to say that and pretend that we are always on board with being a teacher and always loving it, but if we are honest, that isn't exactly true. The reason why I say that is because I've been in some rough waters. I started out the year eager and anxious for what lay ahead. It's my second year teaching and I expected to be easy; well easier at least. And it was but it's still hard. I still have classroom management problems and I still struggle with keeping my lessons relevant and engaging or even just getting them done in time so I'm not frantically making copies of a test that I need to give for the next class period. But here's what I've learned; if you go the safe route and keep on using the same teaching strategies because you know they will work, you better prepare for some challenges coming your way.
I love my kids. I don't get easily angered and I can be very forgiving. But, I can be horrible at disciplining them and keeping there attention. I don't hand out a lot of detentions because I want to work through what's going on with them yet a lot of the time I lack that follow through. So what ends up happening is that things continue to build up until I do eventually get frustrated. When that happens, my lesson plans can suffer. I don't have a lot of variety and I am afraid to try new methods for fear of failure and a disgruntled class to deal with. Yet that's what I need to be doing.
I've heard many times that classroom management problems can stem from- for lack of a better word- "boring" lessons. What I really need to do is get out of my comfort zone and do the crazy sort of things that high schoolers remember their teachers doing well beyond their high school years. Now is the time to find creative ways of relaying information besides just taking notes and doing worksheets. It's time to brainstorm and be creative and do things that I never would have seen myself doing before. Basically it's time to put confidence in myself. I've done it before, I've had a successful first year, but now it's time to kick it up a notch and improve from what I did last year. So there is a danger in doing what you know will work, and it's called frustration and complacency.
The more I've thought about this in my teaching life, the more I realize the applications it has to my spiritual life. It's time for me to kick it up a notch in that area of my life as well. I need to discipline myself and have a time when I can be still and be with God. I need to not only read the Bible every day but also do what it says.
Do you ever get that nagging feeling in the pit of your stomach while reading scripture? That nagging feeling as a name, it's the Holy Spirit and he is calling you into action. Time and time again, the Word of God calls us to trust him completely, that we belong to him and that we are to give all that we are and have to him. But am I doing that? What would that look like in my life?
I've been doing some thinking about these questions and I've come up with this: if I am truly letting Christ rule in my life, that means that my life doesn't truly belong to me but belongs to him instead to fulfill his purposes and not my own. The dangers of living a safe devotional life, of just reading the Bible but not doing what it says can lead to the devil's victory. The very last thing that he wants us to do is what the Bible calls us to do. He will throw each and every excuse our way to claim our lives as our own instead of belonging to God our creator. Fight it! And when you feel like giving up, fight again! Remember that the Lord of all creation is on your side and wants to help you, all you have to do is to let him.
So this is what I've been chewing on these last few weeks. I need to fully trust in God in all areas of my life -school included- because the truth is without knowing that I have him to fall into as my safety net, I'm not sure if I'd be able to do this on my own.
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